Ten Things I Learned in 2017

I have never learned more in one year than my first year of motherhood. But this time around these lessons will stick because as a mom once a lesson is learned there is no turning back. 

10. Friendships go through seasons. If you're upset about a friendship that has drifted, don't be. If it's worth circling back around; it will. But in the meantime your heart will hurt. Deep breaths and let it go. 

9. Life isn't about how many likes you get. If you connect with one person or make a difference to one person; you're enhancing your life and theirs. Sometimes people need to know they're not alone. I've found this especially as a new mom. No one wants perfection- share the real stuff. Connection is irreplaceable. Knowing you're not alone is sometimes all you need to feel sane. 

8. I'm not bad at time management- I'm just that attentive of a Mom. When I first had a baby I was disappointed in myself for not getting things done when I wanted to. Who cares?! I had a happy baby who's mama gave her the world (or what I can of it anyway). 

7. Society still shames for formula feeding your baby. Any way you slice it, it's true. If I had a dollar for every time someone told me to cure something that was going on with Ever with breast milk. Sorry ma'am, I don't have any. 

6. I can argue with my husband until the cows come home, but I want to do better. Although it's healthy in a marriage, babies don't like bickering. So for her, we'll do better. Ok, babe?

5. If you're giving glory to god in everything you do, the rest falls into place. If you remember this one thing at the end of the day- you'll stay a lot more sane. I know this is true for me. I've become a non-dweller.

4. FOMO is real. I admittedly get upset when I see friends doing things I feel like I want to be a part of. My entire life i'd been invited to everything. I was what one would call a "social butterfly". When I had a baby that changed. People assume you can't join in on the fun most times and it's disappointing and hurtful. 

3. Some things don't go as planned. They just don't happen like you'd want or think they should. This is OK. Why? Because God has your back no matter what. And your family does too. So don't lose sight of that & you'll be okay. 

2. If it doesn't feel right- don't do it. Big things, small things, and in between. I've had big, exciting opportunities come my way on days that baby girl just wasn't having it. I'm talking screaming-crying-nothing is going right-kind of days. Stay home, mama. Baby comes first. 

1. Self care is just as important as taking care of your family. "If mama ain't happy ain't nobody happy" am I right?! Take time out. If you're feeling like your headspace is being compromised and you just need to breathe, communicate that. Be open about it with your partner because bottling things up is good for no one. And sometimes a girl just needs to walk the perimeter of homegoods in a very strategic pattern that baby would otherwise not allow.

Happiness isn't defined by reaching goals or everything happening perfectly the way you want it to. It's rather your frame of mind as life is thrown at you. So I'm not going to make a million resolutions I know I won't keep. I'm going to make one promise to myself: find joy in every situation. I'm going to thank God for every opportunity and challenge that comes my way because I know either is meant to shape me into tomorrow's me. 

​Happy New Year, friends!